Happy Ramadhan 2014!

Selamat ber..eh!

Heip!

Selamat Berbu..ah? Move your tangan people!

Selamat Berbuka and Happy Ramadhan to all!

I'm celebrating the holy month of Ramadhan this year in Middlesbrough, UK.

Syukur Alhamdulillah.

Do you know how many hours the Muslim has to fast in England this year?

Its 20.5 hours

Starts from 2.30 am till 9.40pm (on average)

Hats off to all the Muslim in England.

I thank God Allah SWT for easing my way to perform my fast this year.

For awhile there all the memories of my Ramadhan in the last 6 years runs through my mind like a flash back.

The time when I was in my diploma years, where 6 of my friends would gather in a really confined space on the floor to have our buka puasa every day.

And then during my degree years where one of my girlfriend has a car that year so we would go to bazaar and shop our tummy out for food almost every day.

Those nasi kukus and ayam goreng berempah in Shah Alam..aah..heaven!

Then those speedy break fast with my colleagues from work and the girlfriends while spilling the juiciest gossips of the month even though we only had like 1 hour to eat and pray.

Aaa..women and gossips, you know what they say. XOXO Gossip Girl

And right to the Ramadhan last year where I was in a complete mess. 

Ramadhan 2012, yes I was in a major complete mess

And this year, I'm having such a blissful Ramadhan with my friends in our new home.

Not to mention the endless break fast menu where we have trouble of deciding which is which for our menu today.

We even have a whatsapp group dedicated to discuss on what food to cook today.

Outrageous, I know. 

I even brought my bread pudding to bed to feed my already bulging tummy

And yet I'm still hoping on getting a Miranda Kerr's body by end of this month. Sigh

Till then peeps, Happy Ramadhan to all!

xoxo

Grateful

Its almost spring time here in Middlesbrough. Hooray!

After freezing my bones out in the last winter, a little bit of sun was more than a bliss.

Finally I can wear shorts while walking around town.

Bahaha..as if that's gonna happen. 

If it did, I'll look like a whale wearing tights!

Anyway life has been filled with ups and down since the start of the year.

I've been struggling with few assessments, felt deserted by my busy hummingbirds in KL, hook up with an amazing new girlfriends, managed to pass my exams without any glitch and the best part of it, 

I think I've found myself back. 

Its been awhile since last I can say that.

Syukur Alhamdulillah Ya Allah. 

It took me so long to get through these phase and I'm almost there. I am finally me again. 

I've started to laugh out loud, enjoying myself in a crowd, restored my unlimited urge to daydream all the time and I've added going to the gym as a routine! Haha

For whats it worth, it felt good to be me again. 

It felt good to be silly and clumsy. 

It felt really good to be me.

It has been a very looong journey, God knows!

But to my dearest friends who are and always have been the love of my life, I love you to bits. 

I am forever grateful to You Ya Allah for blessing me with these wonderful people around me and for giving me such a humble life that I could have never imagine.

Okey, dah macam speech menang award pulak kan. Hee. 

But truly I am grateful when I think back of all the things that they had done for me. 

I am one lucky girl in that department.

I hope we all are being bless in the same way.

XOXO

Love you!

Closing Bluepandacakes down

PickNik in Publika. Awesome food and a  smilling service

As most of you already know, I have a baking blog that goes by the name Bluepandacakes.

Its my baby project and has been  around for almost a year now for selling homemade cakes.

Throughout the year, the blog has received an overwhelming response for which I have never stop feeling grateful for that. 

The baking blog has been a beacon of light during the time I was going through a very hard times last year and made me realized that will power can always bring you to places.

Sadly I have to shut my baby Bluepandacakes down. Temporarily for a year. 

I have big plans to announce for next coming month.

So, this is the last RV that I'm baking for Bluepandacakes. 

I find it very sentimental to published this post. 

But, cheer up dear self, pray that everything turns out well in the end!

And as for now, keep your heads up about this blog whereabouts.

Cause I'm pretty sure this blog won't be closing down anytime soon.

Toodles!

XOXO. Love you!

The sad thing called The Tragedy

Me, Dyana Lulu and Nadrah, my own personal Sparkles.

********************

There were a few..who actually asked,

"Reena, what happened? " 

and
"What is the tragedy that you're referring to in your blog?"

As much as I want to share it with you girls,
the matter has been very private for me to share.

I think everyone has their own share in life
 that they have to went through to make them stronger.
So "the tragedy" was my share in life to make me a stronger person.


I believe it happens for a reason.
I prayed hard that may it happened for the best of us.

All I knew when "the tragedy" happened,
I was shattered to the core.
I lost myself in the process.
I was blind to all the beautiful things that God has surrounded me with.
I was numb.
It got worst when I could just burst into tears out of nowhere at any given time.

It was tragic.
Even talking about it now almost got me choked up.


Days had passed since it happened and it still hurts.
There are times when I still cry myself to sleep
and felt like ripping myself apart every time I try to overcomes it.

But Allah SWT has helped me so much,
 and I am forever grateful for that.

I never knew that sometimes
what seems like the right thing to do could also
be the hardest thing you have ever done in your life.

Despite all of the tragic drama that happened,
there was never a moment seberat zarah pun of regret in me.
I am happy that it happened.
I am happy that I get to share the bittersweet experience with them.
May Allah blessed me and the people that I cared about always.
Thank you to all your silent prayers.
I love you, always.
xoxo

***********************

My 18 year old baby bro bought me this colourful hand band as a graduation gift.

Aww. Sisterly tears. Thank you munchkin!

Those were the days..

If I could turn back the time I would. 

Even to relive the bitterness that I once shook.

They say to live life with no regrets, 

to move forward and never look back. 

Even to the piece of heaven you once had. 

Life may be full of celebration and surprises,

And yet it still offers you sorrow over the rainbow that passes.

When thoughts are cherished and sad moments become memories. 

For I have always be grateful for each bliss that He has bestowed upon me. 

But if I could turn back the time where peace is relive, 

I would do it without a single thread of a doubt in me.

******************************************************************

Thank you for dropping by

Love you. xoxo.

Nothingness

Every morning I wake up to this new chapter in life.

I marched to the bathroom and saw myself in the mirror.

Then I get dressed and ready for work.

I arrived at work with a fresh start.

The day goes on with absolute emptiness in my heart.

Felt nothing to do nothing. To make no difference in world where none matters. 

Contemplating whether to take charge or let it be.

Till it was time to get home in the early evening.

Dinner time with my family.

And sleep with no ease or cry, just numb and left with nothingness by my side.

Because the lady in the mirror I saw this morning wasn't me,

it was a creature that just simply exists.

****** 

Thank you for still being here.

xoxo.

HECTIC

One word : Kepenatan.

That's the only right word to explain where or what I am right now. But still no complaints.

Here's the summary of whats practically going on these past few months in my silly hectic life.

• Currently, I'm in my semester break till 5th March. Then I'm gonna start my final semester for my degree course with 4 months internship in Approve Group. You can look up about the company here. 
• Even though I'm in my semester break, I've been finalizing my thesis for submission. The word thesis practically been lingering in my mind like a weed in my head. Its amazing how just writing 10,000 words research paper can stole your peace in life.
• Since I'm back home, I've never spend more than 5 hours at home awake. There's always meeting papa for lunch or dinner, visiting my brother at his PLKN camp site, weddings, family gatherings, heading to the bank+mechanics+post office, breakfast with mom, and of course, UiTM Shah Alam. And again, I'm not complaining.
• Besides my hectic schedule, I've managed to finished up reading 3 books that I've bought recently. Micro by Micheal Crichton, Angels Fall by Nora Roberts and Priceless by Nicole Richie.
• My brother went for his PLKN National Service in Sepang. It took approximately 30 min drive from the Sepang F1 Circuit, way up in the rural area.
• Last week my mom and I went for our holiday with my aunts and couple of her friends to Yogyakarta,Indonesia. It was epic. I didn't want to come back home when the time came for our departure. 
• Through the holidays, I got to meet couple of new friends, who is both such sweet and nice people.
• For Chinese New Year this year, I got to sated my longing for Yee Sang, twice. 
• I miss my dorm and my roommates like hell. My dorm has always been my salvation for the past 6 years, and now its gone. It is such a sad feeling and I've been trying to adapt to the new scenario that I'm am going to stay at home from now on, makes me miss my roommates +dorm more.
• I haven't been baking or even cooking since I got home for my break. The only food I ever got chance to cook was frying cekodok for our afternoon tea.
• My cousin's wedding here, was intimate and joyful. She's been planning her wedding for months and seeing how well it all turn out, must be such a relieved for her. Couldn't believe in the first place that she choose me to become her pengapit (bridesmaids) for that day. Thank you Kak Marinee!
• Since this is the last semester break I'll be having, I've managed to squeeze my time to meet my girlfriends. So far, lunch with Normy, ice cream session with Sarah and Fyda, a cup of tea with Dahlia, Farahnaz, Izzah and Intan, and blast of laughter with Nadrah,Dyana and her charming boyfriend of hers, Hafiz. Next stop, more dinner dates with ex classmates from school.

 That will be all, I think.

Till then, I'll update my out and about soon to you guys. 

Have a good day peeps!

xoxo

Sharing Candy

Salam to all my sayang's,

Today was a drag. 

I had an early breakfast and have been yawning all my way from Criminology to Mandarin class. 

The weather was as hot as an oven and I'm still in holiday pace eventhough 

I'm in my 3rd week of the semester.

Currently nothing is happening in my life so I decided to share some of the few things I've done. 

You're free to shut this page if you feel bored already.

Couple of days ago I made the colourful chocolates lollies for my cousin's son aqiqah. (pics above)

Few weeks before,I bake this blue green cupcakes for my cousin's

 khatam al-Quran. All 200 of them.

The decoration was simple,tak mampu nak buat yang fancy-fancy

*But still,I'm so proud of myself*

Then a week before that, I bake this carrot cake. Tapi disebabkan tak sabar nak letak cheesy icing tu, cake tu belum thoroughly cool, saya da letak icing.

Akibatnya,cake tu pecah kat tepi dia and I actually gum balik bahagian yang pecah tu using the icing. 

And so the cake nampak cacat sikit.

And what I did was,I grated half of the cheddar cheese on top the icing ,

sprinkle some red-coloured sugar and voilla!

Though the writing are little bit amateur. Well,I'm not a competent baker.

A month before that, I bake this wonderful tasty cheese cake.

The recipe was easy and took me less than an hour to bake.

And finally,as promised, the view.

This is the view from my current hostel room. 

We got a direct view of  the Canselery and seems to me to be a good final view 

beforeI finally move out from college.

That's all for now. Promise I'll share more if I have something coming up.

Toodles people.

Love you! xoxo

Lonely

Right now I feel so lonely and felt like sulking.

I have this big 'thing' that I've been thinking 

about and so eager to share them with mom,dad and bro. 

First they were supporting the idea and now they are not.

Hell,may be its just me. 

I'm always over excited when it comes to this 

new ideas and all. 

And unfortunately my family has never measured up to the excitement I'm always in.

I don't even know where did I get the  overly-excited genes. 

Definitely not from my parents.

Am I adopted?

By judging on their look and mine, I don't think so.

I guess its just me. 

Its just that I always know that I'm destined for greatness. 

You may call me over achiever or show off. 

But its not.

You know when you sort of know. 

I just knew that I'll be someone more than who I am today. 

And the greatness part just won't happen if I just follow on the path that dad has set for me.

I don't want to rebel but I think I've might.

What stopping me from pursuing my plan is I don't want to loose them in my journey.

I need their blessings to get me there.

Hope I won't be losing my favourite gene along the way too: Clumsy. So me.

Thank you for sparing your time,

xoxo!